Strange day...

[lithera]

I've been writing little e-mails to people all day long. So strange. I haven't done that in awhile, just rambling about whatever comes to mind. Last person I did that with regularly was Mike. It's been awhile.

Apparently I haven't felt like bouncing thoughts for feed back in awhile. Or maybe I just felt that I wasn't going to get back what I was looking for. Or I wasn't going to get back anything that would change the rotation of the thought patterns.

That's the thing about being friends with people for a long time. After awhile, you stop surprising each other. Normally, at least. You need time away from each other, with other people, so you can come back together with new ideas to spark new wheels of thought.

That's why finding new people I really like is a great thing. I really love having new ways to think about things.

So. Yeah.

By the way, newer people, and older people, thinking about it, feel free to ask me anything. I'll answer just about any question, there are just some of them I won't answer publically. There are some answers that require face to face or e-mail or phone or something.

TOMMOROW! PARTY!! Wheeee!

Comments

[eggiebert.livejournal.com]

Knowing people too much was never on my list of things I thoght possible. But it has been known to happen. Even to me.

[lithera.livejournal.com]

It's not even really knowing people too much. There are very few people I can say that about, honestly. And even those people I could probably learn more about.

It is more like getting caught up in rote interactions. After awhile humans drift towards what is comfortable. In order for me to get out of that there needs to be a spark of change. To do that, I either need new people and new patterns or I need to specifically start a new pattern with someone, which is more challenging.

[eggiebert.livejournal.com]

Habbits are hard to break. Even if your the kind of person who dosn't see them actually happening. It's hard to analyze yourself and see what it is that you do without thinking. Because the whole point of it being a habbit is that you aren't thinking about it.

I'm really in the process of making habbits that are on purpose, instead of accidental ones and dealing with all the mystifying concequences that they produce. And that isn't even including other people. It bogles what little of my mind I have left to myself. I guess I'm working on the flip side and trying to have something rote.

If for no other reason than the freedom of not thinking about it.

We are the tinkers of our thoughts.

[lithera.livejournal.com]

I know where you're at. What you're doing is something like what I did when I hit my big depression. I found everything I did by habit or instinct and broke it down until I figured out the why and then I built good ones back up, a lot of them defense mechanisms.

Having somethings rote is good.

[eggiebert.livejournal.com]

...a lot of them defense mechanisms.

I hear ya, do I ever. My cranky little post the other day was all about the defense mechanisim kicking in.. no wait, out.. no wait in... and out again.

No system is failsafe, and it's important to be flexible. And in some places that's not my strongsuit. I was admitedly less freaky because of those little habbits I've been trying to cultivate. Clearly some bugs still to be worked out there.

[lithera.livejournal.com]

There are always bug to be worked out. As much as I would like to think I've planned for everything, it is impossible to do. And in the end, that's a great thing.

[eggiebert.livejournal.com]

Beleiving that you won't shrivel up and die despite disaster is the great thing. Disaster is just, well, disaster. And the conversation about on who's fault disaster belongs is something else entirely. How many times do we set ourselves up for trouble because we can't see ourselves and how we sabotoge our own efforts? It will come out eventually what we are and aren't capable of. And we dont' always have to like it.

[lithera.livejournal.com]

*snugs*

If you never push what you're capable of, you'll never find the limits either. It's one of those things. And a little distaster now and then... It ends up being a healthy thing. Or well, it /can/ end up being a healthy thing.

[eggiebert.livejournal.com]

Mmmm Pain. It reminds us of wear our armor is thin. And perhaps those places where armor just *ahem* shouldn't go. You will be pushed. You will be tested. You will most likely survive. Because the trials before us are only hard because of what we do and what we allow into ourselves, into our lives.

The rediculous part is that you can change it anytime you like. Any time you want to recognise that nothing is set in stone. Not even stone. We can take the hardest things and shape them into a monument of our acomplishments. It's just weather or not you know how to use the tools.

And how to sharpen then when the inevitably dull.

[lithera.livejournal.com]

Thank you for the smile. I don't know why but that made me smile.

I like to say, "That which doesn't kill us makes us stranger." It isn't to say that we aren't stronger as well but we are shaped by our experiences and no two people come out of something the same way.

Are you going to make it to the party tomorrow?

[eggiebert.livejournal.com]

We are strange to begin with. Tinkers, tinkers tinkers.

I'm going to arrive a bit on the late side, say qaurter of nine or so. I will bring some 151. And we shall rejoyce.

Amen.

[lithera.livejournal.com]

Indeed. It shall be good to see you again, my dear. Indeed.

[eggiebert.livejournal.com]

Seing is all I ever do. I'm so glad my glasses work, so that I can actually. You know, see 'n' stuff.

::snugs::