I am in a bad mood.

[lithera]

I am not sure why, exactly, I am in a bad mood.

I'm generally grumpy but in a sort of insidious way. It is the sort of grumpy that is waiting for in the the dark corners. It is the grumpy and maybe even more than grumpy that is dragging everything else down. It is the sort of mood that makes me doubt myself, that sometimes grows into a full blown paranoia moment if I don't catch it. It is the sort of mood that isn't bad all alone but has the potential to grow into me wondering what the hell I'm doing, why I even try and wondering if maybe things would be better if I just went away and left everyone alone for awhile.

Maybe I should stop being so damned nosy and leave people to themselves. Who am I kidding with thinking that I can make things better for anyone when I can't make things better for myself?

Maybe I should go away until I'm an amazingly awesome person who makes the right moves, says the right things and has carved about half of my physical self away to be closer to where I should be.

I am in a bad mood.

Ugh.

Comments

[pullthestars.livejournal.com]

Don't go without a kitten.




(you can take Edmund.)

[lithera.livejournal.com]

Somehow I get the feeling Edmund would not be so useful on a quest.

[pullthestars.livejournal.com]

definitely not if you were trying to be sneaky.

*sneak sneak sneak*

"MROW. MROW. MROW. MROW."

[lithera.livejournal.com]

DOOOOOOOORK.

Maybe if we could find all of those smaller Edmunds inside... That could be a useful power move or something.

[pullthestars.livejournal.com]

Except that they'd all just want skritches and shed all over the place. Though they could swarm an enemy...

[lithera.livejournal.com]

If you could get them to do that... That would be keen.

[alryssa.livejournal.com]

Enh, Zinda could take 'em. ALL OF THEM. With her SUPER WHISKER ACTION.

[yellowseptember.livejournal.com]

You do make things better, dear. Can't even begin to tell you.

[lithera.livejournal.com]

Sometimes it feels like swimming up stream.

[yellowseptember.livejournal.com]

I love you, sweetie.

[lithera.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

[uberdude.livejournal.com]

Hulk need smash?


(I think you rock btw)

[lithera.livejournal.com]

I would like to smash. Smash good.

[uberdude.livejournal.com]

If I were local, I'd be more than happy to brace the heavybag for ya.

[lithera.livejournal.com]

Thanks. I appreciate it.

regarding the physical self comment

[chatrient.livejournal.com]

Phenomenal Woman By Maya Angelou
Pretty women wonder where my secret lies.
I'm not cute or built to suit a fashion model's size
But when I start to tell them,
They think I'm telling lies.
I say,
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips,
The stride of my step,
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I walk into a room
Just as cool as you please,
And to a man,
The fellows stand or
Fall down on their knees.
Then they swarm around me,
A hive of honey bees.
I say,
It's the fire in my eyes,
And the flash of my teeth,
The swing in my waist,
And the joy in my feet.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Men themselves have wondered
What they see in me.
They try so much
But they can't touch
My inner mystery.
When I try to show them
They say they still can't see.
I say,
It's in the arch of my back,
The sun of my smile,
The ride of my breasts,
The grace of my style.
I'm a woman

Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

Now you understand
Just why my head's not bowed.
I don't shout or jump about
Or have to talk real loud.
When you see me passing
It ought to make you proud.
I say,
It's in the click of my heels,
The bend of my hair,
the palm of my hand,
The need of my care,
'Cause I'm a woman
Phenomenally.
Phenomenal woman,
That's me.

I stand 5 ft 11 and have never been built to a fashion models size. I am what ancient painters would call "rubeneqse" ~ I call it curvy :P I am more apt to hear "baby got back!" sung to a rap tune than some other romantic song. Yet, remember that we are so much more than our physical selves. It's not about weight so much but, pun intended, how we carry it and ourselves.

Please Do not forget that. Or if you have a bad day and forget it, please print out that poem and hang it right next to your front door, so its the last thing you see as you head out of the house (thats where my copy hangs!)

As for saying the right things and making the right moves, sadly there is no script for life and it's not choreorgraphed because it is not a movie or a public speech. I just wish there was an instruction manual :P I'll put my foot in my own mouth and stumble around if someone would only tell me how to live my life to its fullest.

It's your life, & you're the only one necessary part of living it. Well, Dr Pepper helps me live mine so pick your beverage of choice :)

Please don't go away ~ Well, unless you are traveling somewhere FUN and going on a vacation :)

**hugs** Forgive the long arsed lecture but I am honestly trying to help :)
chat

Re: regarding the physical self comment

[lithera.livejournal.com]

Thanks, Auntie.

I appreciate it.

[fair-witness.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

Been there. Done that. Trying to keep from getting stuck.

[lithera.livejournal.com]

Thanks.

I'm just... I can't seem to get past it.

Rar.

[counterweight.livejournal.com]

You rock. Old man says so.

[lithera.livejournal.com]

Thank you.

[amit.livejournal.com]

*holds you tight*

*licks your ear a little too.*

[lithera.livejournal.com]

*hugs*

Thanks, Amit.