All a lie.

[lithera]

I've been doing this for months.

I've bee going to the gym for months and there are times when I feel like I might be getting somewhere. I haven't lost any weight. I haven't lost any inches. I tell myself it'll happen. I cut more and more things out of what I eat. I eat small portions, six times a day. I don't intake a lot of sugar, I don't eat big meals.

Physically sometimes I feel better and sometimes I just feel like I'm falling apart.

Emotionally, I... Well. I don't want to type how I feel here since it just feels like a plea for attention which it isn't but I can't convince mysel of any valid reason to pour myself out in front of people like that.

Let me just say I am not happy and leave it at that.

I don't want platitudes. I don't want people to send me hugs or tell me it is going to be okay. I .... I'm so jealous of the people around me who are losing weight successfully. It feels horrible of me not to just be happy for them. I should be better than that.

I don't know what to do because I can feel myself starting to lose hope again.

I'm so very tired.