What I learned this weekend.
Jan. 27th, 2008 07:09 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
litheraLaughter helps all things, even if it isn't exactly stable laughter.
No matter what work I do to fix broken systems, broken rules, broken semantics, broken lines of communication... None of it matters if the people are too battered and bruised to participate. There are a lot of people scared and hurt and tired out there and while I'm good at helping people heal one at a time - I can't help them all at once.
I'm not sure I can help heal some of them at all.
And I hate that. I hate that in ways it is hard to describe. I've already had to leave the sword at home, to drop the shield and make sure that who ever wanted a clear shot at me had it. Now I'm in a position where I cannot really help people heal. Some bridges cannot be rebuilt. It isn't something that can be forced nor should it be. It leaves me entirely uncertain about my next steps. I feel like I'm in the Buffy musical all of a sudden.
All I can do is hope that the adage of when God closes a door, He opens a window proves to be true. I will be out of town starting Wednesday, so it will be out of my hands for a few days at that point. There is very, very little I hate more than being unable to do something about a situation. It drives me crazy - literally some times depending on the severity of the situation at hand.
I learned I still love The Presidents of the Unites States of America. They put on a fantastic show.
I love my friends. I love them very much. I also worry a lot about them. From whether or not they're warm and safe, to will they make it home okay when they leave my apartment, to a million other things - all day, every day. I wish, some times, that I could stop worrying so very much.
I learned that Liam Neeson was the Youth Heavyweight Champion of Ireland for three consecutive years.
I learned that Christian Bale's step mother is Gloria Steinam.
Not all important things but, you know...
No matter what work I do to fix broken systems, broken rules, broken semantics, broken lines of communication... None of it matters if the people are too battered and bruised to participate. There are a lot of people scared and hurt and tired out there and while I'm good at helping people heal one at a time - I can't help them all at once.
I'm not sure I can help heal some of them at all.
And I hate that. I hate that in ways it is hard to describe. I've already had to leave the sword at home, to drop the shield and make sure that who ever wanted a clear shot at me had it. Now I'm in a position where I cannot really help people heal. Some bridges cannot be rebuilt. It isn't something that can be forced nor should it be. It leaves me entirely uncertain about my next steps. I feel like I'm in the Buffy musical all of a sudden.
All I can do is hope that the adage of when God closes a door, He opens a window proves to be true. I will be out of town starting Wednesday, so it will be out of my hands for a few days at that point. There is very, very little I hate more than being unable to do something about a situation. It drives me crazy - literally some times depending on the severity of the situation at hand.
I learned I still love The Presidents of the Unites States of America. They put on a fantastic show.
I love my friends. I love them very much. I also worry a lot about them. From whether or not they're warm and safe, to will they make it home okay when they leave my apartment, to a million other things - all day, every day. I wish, some times, that I could stop worrying so very much.
I learned that Liam Neeson was the Youth Heavyweight Champion of Ireland for three consecutive years.
I learned that Christian Bale's step mother is Gloria Steinam.
Not all important things but, you know...
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2008-01-28 04:31 am (UTC)In fact, i slept straight through till 11am, and I could still use a bit of a nap.... ;-)
Maybe if I had another day of SLEEP I would feel human before Monday. Maybe if I do the snow dance... ;-)
Beyond that, don't worry about me. Week of heel is over, I lived, and now it's just back to normal busy.
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Date: 2008-01-28 04:33 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-01-28 04:35 am (UTC)I also thought about calling Leigh as I left to let her know I was coming home.
I assumed you were both asleep at those points, and I was wrong on both counts. GO ME! :-P
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Date: 2008-01-28 04:38 am (UTC)It's totally cool.
Even if it snows tomorrow, I have to go in. Wheee.
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Date: 2008-01-28 04:42 am (UTC)Of course even if it snows tomorrow, I'll probabally have to go in too. Too close to a big release for me to be able to stay home.
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Date: 2008-01-28 04:43 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-01-28 06:26 am (UTC)*tightly*
Things will work out, in the end.
They usually do.
For what little it may be worth, I'm sorry.
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Date: 2008-01-28 06:31 am (UTC)I'm not really angry at anyone.
I'm just very, very frustrated.
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Date: 2008-01-28 06:50 am (UTC)That is about all I have learned so far this month.
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Date: 2008-01-28 06:57 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-01-28 01:58 pm (UTC)*hug* Hang in there.
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Date: 2008-01-28 04:42 pm (UTC)I am taking my phone. At least that's the plan.
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Date: 2008-01-28 05:48 pm (UTC)This totally sounds like I'm hitting on you. Ahem. I just want to share. Plus a new pic of you'd be nice too.
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Date: 2008-01-28 05:50 pm (UTC)I can, though I'm really hit and miss on it working.
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Date: 2008-01-28 09:21 pm (UTC)*neighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh*
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Date: 2008-01-28 09:22 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2008-01-28 09:24 pm (UTC):|
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Date: 2008-01-28 09:25 pm (UTC)Hrmmmm.
One time...
Date: 2008-01-28 10:43 pm (UTC)"This is not a loss, but an opportunity."
Blessings to you!
E.
Re: One time...
Date: 2008-01-28 10:46 pm (UTC)