[personal profile] lithera
He he he....



You Know You're a Classics Nerd When...
by Caroline Bishop
-You wear all black on the Ides of March
-You think it was Lewis and Short that hiked across America.
-Someone starts talking about Paris and you immediately think of the Trojan War
-If someone insults you, you just respond with a Catullus poem
-You have a giant poster of Michael Ventris in your room, with the word TRIPOD written beneath his head
-If male, the size of your Liddell and Scott becomes a metaphor for something much, much more important.
-You tried to make a list of historical inaccuracies in 'Gladiator', but you ran out of paper
-You go to a Latin mass, and start correcting the priest
-Someone says the word attic and you think they're talking about a Greek dialect
-You talk about people that died thousands of years ago as if they were still alive and you have a relationship with them (e.g., "I hate/love Cicero" or "Demosthenes kicked my ass last night."
-You know what zeugma is, and you can point out at least three instances of it
-You know Latin/Greek grammar better than your mother language's
-You call France Gaul, and refer to the Middle East as "those Persian lands"
-You know more about Cicero than you do about your significant other
-Sometimes, you think Cicero IS your significant other
-You refer to Housman as "that evil genius"
-No matter how many movies they make, Derek Jacobi, John Hurt, and Brian Blessed are always Claudius, Caligula, and Augustus to you
-You always get so confused when someone on your college campus mentions "Greek life"
-You believe you are Ennius reincarnate, with a few years as a peacock in between
-Sometimes you accidentally "slip" into the Greek alphabet
-Colleges have asked you to write their mottoes for them
-Aposiopesis is your favorite figure of speech, and you can quote that line from Vergil to prove it
-You speak in dactylic hexameter
-You scanned that last entry to see if it WAS in dactylic hexameter
-You wish Shakespeare had never coined the phrase, "It's all Greek to me"
-You yell, "No, Patroklos, don't do it!" while reading the Iliad
-You write a song/make a movie about Linear A or Linear B
-If you had a sesterce for every time someone has asked you what you're going to do with your major...
-You've staged a battle between mice and frogs
-You've ever wondered how Medea got around so much
-You go to a toga party and start trying to fold everyone's togas accurately
-You keep trying to reconstruct the last chorus of the Bacchae
-You spend 2.5 hours coming up with a "you know you're a classics nerd when" list
-You actually know what you're going to do with your major
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lithera

June 2011

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