A good article

[lithera]

http://www.salon.com/mwt/excerpt/2009/01/24/kate_harding/

Now, I'm not saying that I can handle or ask for what she is with the same sort of aplomb but I'm certainly getting there. I'll say that when I hear or think about my weight, that a lot of those other words are certainly attached to it. In fact, at least seven of those terms plague me. I can say that I have had some of the experiences that she describes, though 'fluffy' is certainly a new term on me. Kris says she's heard it but man, fluffy would surely get a laugh out of me.

Anyway, thanks Kris pullthestars for linking it in your journal and if anyone wants to chat about the concepts in here, I'm game if you are.

Comments

How is this such a big issue? No pun intended.

[eggies-red-dres.livejournal.com]

I'm a happy generally outgoing and shameless person. I don't have a problem saying potentially embarasing antics I may have pulled, and sometimes say rude things with no intention of being so. For all that unconcious noise and potential mistakes socially speaking, it's like talking about being overweight or oversized is completely a taboo subject for me. Wouldn't even cross my lips to talk about first hand if someone else didn't bring it up.

It's amazing how I still *feel* awkward, and weak willed when faced with the idea of "getting healthy" when it really means trying to loose weight without seeming like I'm trying to. Because admitting that I 'should' loose weight? How do you consciously admit it when weight is looked down on so viciously? It must even be in my head because otherwise it would just be a thing I have to do, like grocery shopping, or making an Olympus appointment, but somehow it's an assessment of value and admitting that I have low marks there associates poorly with other things.

It makes me question why exactly I want to loose weight at all. Or if I really do. At this point My health doesn't suffer, but do I really want suffering to be my bar of action? Do I really want social anxiety and disapproval be my bar either? Most of this is emotional baggage that steps in the way. I wonder if it's just a girlie thing to worry about these bad feelings like somehow because i spent so much time on them they are worth keeping. Like somehow it's worth saving, it saved me from some *worse* feeling before didn't it? Isn't this bad habbit still protecting me?

Re: How is this such a big issue? No pun intended.

[lithera.livejournal.com]

Yes.

Pretty much what you've said. One of the factors here is that it is hard - very hard - to actually lose weight. It is really challenging. And it isn't fast in anyway. It, the scientists now say, takes 9 months to a year of constant exercise and diet change to make an improvement. It needs to to be a life change and a commitment to it. That isn't easy and even then, the results you get might just be in over all health and not much weight lost.

My bar for action is wanting to feel better. I wasn't exactly suffering because of it but I knew I could feel better than I did. There is certainly some societal pressure in there too. I'm sure every single woman has felt it at some point.

Re: How is this such a big issue? No pun intended.

[eggies-red-dres.livejournal.com]

Well thank goodness they are being more realistic about the time frame. It occurs to me some people 'diet' for a short period because they feel emotionally 'fat', not to actually address any issue of weight. I should be loosing 60 Lbs, and it's not just going to freakin' happen in the 30 day plans you get stuck with off the bookstore shelf. The time frame is such that if I feel *bad* about being overweight, I'll loose heart long before I loose the wight. I have to find a more effective motivation, and all that's in my head is "eww! bellyflab I"m wearing what size!!eleventy!" and blathering on about how bad it is.

The funny thing is about that is I have family and friends that are overweight and that's not how I see *THEM*. I would never. They have cute buns and nice boobs and it's not about the negative image. How is it that I somehow am worthy of the shaft I have to wonder.

Re: How is this such a big issue? No pun intended.

[lithera.livejournal.com]

No, I understand. I really do. I've been going to the gym since May. There are improvements I've noticed. I don't get as tired, I can go to Comic Con and walk that whole time and not feel as though I'm dying, I don't get sick as often and my allergies aren't as bad. There are benefits, certainly, but so far not one of them has been losing any weight. I think I know what I need to do to change that but even though I'm in the gym now, changing it up is just as hard as going in the first place.

[jeditigger.livejournal.com]

Awesome article.

[wandelrust.livejournal.com]

Ugh. Yeah, loaded subject, that.

The thing that drives me absolutely bonkers up the wall crazy is that otherwise reasonably intelligent people, from doctors to family members, seem to be unable to grasp any sense of context when it comes to weight.

Yes, people with a BMI over such and such are more likely, on average, to have health problems. That's great if you're average. Almost no one is.

For one thing, people have different builds. My tall skinny 6'3" friend would be overweight at 200 pounds, whereas I'd be thrilled to be only 200, even at a measly 6'. For another, different bodies simply have different base weight levels and metabolisms. Yes, it's less healthy, in general, to be heavier, but different bodies will deal with it better than others.

Too many people also seem unable to grasp the fact that some people are just heavy, not cause they're stupid, or lazy, or don't understand that eating too much will make them gain weight. Even my doctor felt the need to explain that fruit juice has calories, and if I drink enough of it, I'll gain weight.

I'm not in as good shape as I should be, or even as I'd like to be, largely because the past year has been full of upheaval and I'm not getting the exercise I'd like. But even when I was at my best, when I was getting a ton of exercise and was relatively young and not eating tons of sweets, I was fat. Less fat, but still fat. I'm never going to be skinny. I've come to terms with that (mostly), but it's an annoying thing to have to explain to everyone else too.

[lithera.livejournal.com]

I know. It drives me crazy too. It is so bizarre how we react to these things without thinking. Sure, when we think about it we can pull it all apart but that's challenging to do, especially with any speed. I could lose half my body weight and be about where I should be. Right now, I'm settling for being healthier and stronger. I hope the weight will come off and there are things I can change to help with that, which I'll be starting soon, but still, I'm happy to be doing /something/.

Hello flip side

[silverbrood.livejournal.com]

over here, on the other side of the coin.

This last 6 months I have spent an additional 30 dollars a week on food and suppliments - and gained 3 pounds. Eat til you're sick from it every day and nuthin'

I'm glad to have rea dhis article though because there are any number of times I've onserved that particular activity on page 2 of the post: "they look at me and say I'm normal and whining then look at their own identical body and say OMG FAT"

As a chronicly lanky male I hae the antithesis of credibility when I try to point aht kind of thing out or even suggest that a persons body image is perhaps too harsh.

Maybe this sort of blog can be somethng I can direct people too. 'if you dopn't want to believe the skinny dude maybe you should listen to some more honest of your cohorts.'

Re: Hello flip side

[lithera.livejournal.com]

Feel free. Anyone I can help to a better self image!